Sunday, March 19, 2006

Let's move on

In order to get this blog moving I will quote a post from Nicola R (the original can be found here).

"1) Confidence matters. He needs to hold himself well. This means eye contact that is strong but not creepy. He stands straight, looks around, moves confidently, will smile or touch you appropriately. When I know a man well enough and have been giving good signals, he initiates touch. If this happens when it hasn't been invited by smiles and nonverbal signals, it's creepy. But when I've been encouraging, a touch on the arm or shoulder, or a hand on the small of the back to steer me across the street or out a door is welcome. I like the feeling of a man who signals that he wants to touch me, and that he will take care of me when we're out together -- that he knows where I am, that he's alert to my body, etc. This can be signalled with a confidence in touch.

2) He needs to be smart and sociable. This means listening as much as talking, and talking with a point. Trying to show off comes across as insecure. I guess this kind of social behavior comes back to confidence. Confidence is attractive.

3) Physical traits: womens' tastes vary. I don't generally go for really hunky guys. And I'm attracted to some things that other women don't like. I like a hairy chest and arm hairs, for example, and I like bald men. I prefer lean men to stocky or overly muscular ones. Tall doesn't matter that much to me, as long as he's taller than me. But what matters (I'm sounding like a broken record) is that a man is neatly groomed, dressed with a sense of style (or at least a tidiness), and that he conveys a sense of comfort with who he is. He should like what he looks like. Again, confidence. It matters so much more than the particulars of his features. I've dated tall men and short ones, dark complected and light, bearded and clean shaven.

4) You should smell good, but only when I am very very close to you. Cologne is permissible but only in very very small doses. Don't get this wrong -- it's a real turnoff if you smell too strongly. And clean laundry smell is a really nice one for men, or Old Spice, so you don't need anything special.

5) You need to be brave about showing interest in me. I can't really tell what I think of someone until I read the "vibe" of him liking me. So you have to be comfortable putting it out there, being flirtatious and attentive and complimentary. Again, it's confidence. No self-deprecation, please. Just let me see what you want, in a friendly no-pressure way. That's fun, it's electric.

6) You should be good at something that you care a lot about for its own sake. Not for the money or the social standing you think it gives you, but because you just love it. That's really attractive. Let me see your passion. I don't care what it is -- baseball card trading, or climbing mountains, or restoring old cars. But it should be a serious dedication. It shows that you can dedicate yourself to something, that you have a world beyond work and beyond girls, and that you have things to teach me. That's atractive."


Thanks Nicky.

Well ladies, it wasn't that hard.
Let's see your opinion.

Cheers,
dsp

2 Comments:

Blogger sophie n said...

Physically, I (and this is just me) love a gq man....i love a man in suits and glasses and the whole bit....i like a man who is taller and bigger than me because it makes me feel smaller and "taken care of" so to speak....a lot of times its his smile that i am attracted to or just the simple fact that i find him hot!

I like a nice guy...i don't like crude men who make stupid jokes about boobs and ass....i want to be respected and known that my opinion matters....i want someone who makes me laugh...i want a gentleman, one that opens doors because it is polite but one who also understands that i am just as capable as any man, and that i am not inferior because of my sex....

i want someone who will listen with me, work with me, support me....i want someone who challenges me....i hate games because its pointless....if you like me tell me...don't be afraid to hurt my feelings, tell me the truth....humility and nobility go a long way for me, while arrogance and vanity will get you nowhere....

i want romance....flowers, candy, bears, songs, candlelit dinners...the whole nine yards...i want to swoon and be swept off my feet....

i think confidence is very attractive in a man....i think seeing a man comfortable in a social environment is attractive because he's so at ease and puts everybody else at ease...

i want a man who knows more than just baseball statistics....he doesn't have to graduate from an ivy league, but i want to be mentally stimulated....he keeps up on world events and is open minded....

i know i have high expectations of men, but i am worth it, as is any woman out there...

i don't think the question is "what makes him THE MAN" but its "what makes him MY man..." my man makes me happy...theres a song by bryan adams that sums up how it is to love a woman...once you learn to do that, you've got it made....well, at least in my eyes anyways...
: )

8:11 PM  
Blogger Endless Dick said...

Sophie, what about a man who has tall ideas, does that make him any more attractive?

1:17 AM  

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